Monday, June 21, 2010

Ben and his Daddy

We had a great Father's Day. I wanted to make it extra special, since it's our first one with Ben. The rest of the kids were all with their other parents, so it was just the three of us, and we went to Skaneateles. It was an absolutely gorgeous day here in upstate NY--a day that could almost make you forget about the other seasons, and make a California girl actually *want* to live here. :-)

Anyway, we had lunch on the waterfront at the Bluewater Grill, which was great. The place gets mixed reviews online, but I've loved it every time I've been there. The food was delicious, the service was great, and the views were lovely.

After lunch we took a sightseeing cruise on the lake, which was so nice. We both really, really love the water. And then we strolled down the main street and looked in several stores before heading back home.

All-in-all it was a pretty much perfect day.

And on the occasion of Father's Day, I wanted to write a little bit about how bonded Ben is with his dad. It's pretty extraordinary. I've never seen anything like it. It's been like that from the day we brought him home from the hospital. He completely adores Bob, and seems utterly fascinated/compelled by him. He will just stare and stare, adoringly, at Bob's face. At less than two weeks old he smiled at Bob, and has been smiling at him ever since. (He does smile at other people, but with nowhere near the frequency he does with Bob.) When he's fussy, he'll calm right down on Bob's chest. When we put him on the bed between us, he finds a way to scooch himself over (he has done this from the beginning) and plaster himself next to Bob, and then he flails his little arms and legs around (batting at Bob) until Bob picks him up and puts him on his chest. Ben usually at that point puts his arms straight out to the sides, as if he's giving his daddy a giant hug. And then he promptly falls asleep. He has wanted me when he's hungry, but that's pretty much been it, and in fact if Bob could feed him I think he'd be happy never to leave Bob's side!

About 95% of the time, I think this is wonderful. Honestly, I was the one who was initially most enthusiastic about having another kid (though Bob was certainly on board), so it's been a beautiful thing to see this incredible bond between the two of them, and how much joy it brings Bob. We have even said that we kind of feel like Ben is here for Bob. Maybe that sounds weird, but if you could see it, you might know what I mean. He's certainly changing Bob's life in a huge way, because Bob has decided not to go back to teaching next year, but to stay home with him, which we're all really thrilled about. It's also just really nice to feel that this little being who needs so much doesn't need it all from me--it's great to be able to share the caregiving as well as the love.

But every once in a while I do get just a little jealous! Mostly after a marathon feeding session when he then wants to go to Bob, and will look up at him with this expression of satisfaction and gratitude, like "Wow, Dad, thanks for that great meal!" Humph! I think it would be at least a little more fair if Bob were the one who had to give up dairy!

Anyway, every day Ben is more and more alert, and he's getting more tuned into me as well, which I am enjoying. In fact, he's plastered right up against my side right this minute. So sweet.

A few pics of our day, and of Ben and his daddy:

In front of the Bluewater Grill

Inside, a primo window seat for Ben!

Itty, bitty, baby feet!!

Back in the car, for a quick feed and a cuddle

A gorgeous day out on the lake!

Drinky-poo on the boat

Cheers to you, Daddy!

More lovely lake views

"Judge Ben" has a nice ring to it

And now a few pictures of Ben enjoying his favorite spot (right next to, or on top of, Dada):

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